Friday, June 15, 2007

Things to Think About

I am searching frantically for a house. We are down to the wire. We have to be out of here by September 1st. We are buying a fixer-upper so we want at least 3 weeks - we have to settle on August 8th. So that leaves me about 3 weeks to find a house.

No sweat!

On a little "yeah me" note, the five week summer psych course - Im aceing it. WOOHOO! Of course, I study a lot also.

I cant seem to shake this sore throat. I sound like a frog. On the other hand, I can do an awesome Fiona Apple impression.

I lost 21 pounds, which was 10% of my weight. And before you think to smart off - when was the last time YOU lost 10% of your weight? That's what I thought. I cant help but feel like Im turning back time. Hopefully, I can mirror it. My goal was 8 pounds a month (I have 2 weeks left in this month). The last time I was this weight was in June, 2005.

I remember when I got weighed in the OBs office thinking "okay, 11 more weeks. I can keep it under 200." Then the horror of going in the next week and being told I was 205. I knew right then I was having the baby. I started crying. I pretended I was crying because of my weight. I didnt want to scare J. But I knew.

My theory about the whole weight gain thing is that the first 20 pounds - before I even knew was because I think my metabolism just shuts down when Im pregnant. I dont eat more, I just gain like I do. No matter. Ive now turned back the clock. I am the same weight I was in June of 2005. If I lose 8 pounds a month by December 2007 I will be the same weight I was in December 2004. And I get to keep the baby!

The job situation is getting hairy. I need about 30 more hours in each day. If I finish filling out the 2 tons of paperwork before June 30th I can get a $4000 grant for school AND continue my unemployment. So worth it. Now - to the paperwork!

And what I am really really really trying very hard not to think about is the possibility of Face's open-heart surgery. Sont let anyone lie to you about kids resilience. I swear adults feed each other bullshit so much they've forgotten how to tell just by the smell of it.

This is what it is like for your kid to be in the hospital:

Nuff said.

1 comment:

katied said...

i'm a little confused...are you pregnant again? congrats on the weight loss. i'm struggling with that. if i lost 10% of my body weight, i'd be freakin' thrilled.